It’s an age-old question that some liken to the meaning or life, or the recipe for Colonel Sander’s fried chicken. But will we ever really know? A recent study tried to dissect the issue into what women want and what women think. And the results have been interesting.
What women think is largely governed by where society (read: men) has placed them in the bedroom – and that generally means in a subservient position. Men like to think of their women as pure and virile things, and women feel the need to ascribe to this notion. When it comes to their past men like to think they get first crack at a woman. And women lie about their sexual past all the time, dumbing down numbers so as not appear a ‘slut’.
Women are also turned off by jealous jerks. While a teeny bit of jealousy can be endearing, overbearing paranoid small-minded losers are just that – losers that women generally avoid. Being questioned about every text message that comes in or passing glance at another man is not the way to woo a woman’s heart.
Some women also have liberal views on cheating. The study on to detail the thoughts of one female who went from thinking that affairs were symptoms of moral character to feeling that an affair happens as a result of someone crying out after feeling totally alone in a marriage, and that could feeling either sexually or emotionally isolated. The hardest thing to come to terms with is the feeling that there is no recourse, or way out. Single people always have the safety net of hope that there will always be someone out there for them. But people stuck in marriages have no hope. They are forever bound to the same person unless they make a drastic move to chance this situation, as in a divorce or find solace elsewhere, as in an affair. The huge popularity of sites such as AshleyMadison.com has shown that the latter has become a viable option for many in loveless marriages.
Boiling it down to what women really want, the study had some interesting conclusions. Women don’t want a pansy, or a man that is scared to make the first move. Lovemaking tends to be a dull affair. Taboo sex is not always a total turnoff, but it has to be classy. Acting out some of the more naughty fantasies is a big no-no with women, while merely having the thoughts seems to be OK. Finally, threesomes can be dangerous. In an established relationship, it is hard to hide jealousies and self-conscious feelings, emotions that are generally not present in younger couples and which could impede in the enjoyment of a good threesome.